August 15, 2006

OINK!

Wesley Pruden has a great idea for securing our airplanes from terrorism.

Why not, for example, an all-pork, all-the-time airline, with its Boeings emblazoned with a ferocious razorback on the tail assembly? Each cabin would be equipped with a small, elegantly designed pig pen somewhere among the first-class seats, accommodating an endearing baby porker. This would play to the Islamist terror of dying in a crash and arriving in paradise festooned with juicy pig entrails. Would a jihadist warrior expect to greet a virgin with tasty infidel barbecue on his breath?

Even a more modest employment of the noble pig could make a lot of expensive, infuriating airport security unnecessary. The airlines could replace inedible airline food with offering a choice of ham or bacon, lettuce and tomato sandwiches — or matzoh ball soup for Jewish passengers who would get the joke but nevertheless wish to keep kosher in the friendly skies. This would send devout jihadists fleeing to alternative transportation on their way to assignations with violent death.

Works for me!

by @ 11:11 pm. Filed under Homeland Security, Humor, Terrorism
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4 Responses to “OINK!”

  1. Old Soldier Says:

    I think every US Soldier’s uniform should include pigskin boots and gloves, and every projectile from 5.56 mm to 155 mm should have a certain amount of pig blood inside the jacket; wrap grenades in pig skin, etc. These sick bastards picked the fight with us, so let’s make no bones about our determination to send their asses to Hell. Blackjack Pershing, where are you when we need you?

  2. Seth Says:

    Wasn’t Pershing the one who did the thing with the pig blood on the bullets and then sent the surviving prisoners back to inform their comrades about it?

    Yes!

  3. Old Soldier Says:

    Seth, yes, the story is credited to Perhsing; when he was in the philipines and the Moors were giving our forces some trouble.

    Anyone for repeating history?

  4. Seth Says:

    Me me me!!!!